Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Selfie

One of the areas of my life I have been trying to work on is....loving me! Loving myself just the way I am...overweight but happy, unhappy but hopeful, hopeful but doubtful...see full of uncertainty but optimistic of the work God is doing inside of me.

So, I have decided that I need to start taking selfies to see myself for who and what I am.....

 

This is Klondike and I after one of our hikes (he wouldn't smile for the camera). Part of trying to love myself is to lose some much needed weight, trying to walk/hike 15 miles a week. Which is not much but I hope to increase the amount as time goes on. I have lost 2 pounds since we have started this. Not a lot but it is a start. Klondike is a great motivator, he knows at 9:00pm it is time for a walk and will whine until he gets one. Its pretty annoying so I have to give in.

I love being out in the trails and seeing what beauty God has created for us. Looking at how perfectly He designed everything. From the birds in the trees, the bugs on the ground to the green grass that grows all around. Wow, he thought of everything. He designed me to love His creations.

I love, love being anywhere near the ocean!! After I took this picture, I was walking back to my car when a punk ass kid yelled 'go fatty' at me. A few years that would have made me cry and beat myself up mentally. This time I let it roll off of my back. That punk knows nothing about me, he does not know the struggles I have with losing weight.

When I look at this picture of me, I see someone who is starting to be content with who she is, someone that does not see value in what others think of her. Of course I want everyone to love me, but I know that is not going to always happen. And that is ok, my feeling is that if you don't want to take the time to know me then it is one you not me. I am a great person with a lot of love to give.

One more near my favorite place...the ocean!! Specifically Sunset Cliffs in Point Loma. This has to be the most beautiful place in San Diego!! God really did some overtime on this place!! He keeps crafting it when the waves crash against the cliffs to reshape them. I love how strong the ocean is, how unpredictable it is.

Have to say I love this picture of me, I see a content person and my true smile is there (but of course I hate my nose and neck in it, but I am learning to let that go). God is really starting to put me back together and remaking me into the women he wants me to be and I cannot wait for the finished product!

If I learned anything in the last 11 months of being out of work, is that it is necessary for me to go to my favorite places, to enjoy nature and all that God has created. To stop and look at the beauty and give thanks for it. And I have to start learning to love myself despite the flaws I see because more than likely no one else sees them. God does not see them.....so why should I? I was made in His image and He is not flawed!!

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San Diego, CA, United States