Monday, August 22, 2011

Things learned while teaching your son to drive

Jonathan has started to drive and I am having the hardest time!!! Not because he is a bad driver (he does have a lot to learn, like breaking), it's because I have to give up control!

I am the driver, I have been driving them since they were born. I always drive! And now I have to give up the control of driving. And I think its more then Jonathan driving, its that he is growing up!

This morning we were driving and I told him that the reason I freak out when he is driving is because I like to be in control! He smiled and looked and me and said "Mom its time to let it all go!" Wow my wise child!

How in the heck do I do that? And when did I become such a control freak?

Gesh...growing up is hard at 43!

Monday, August 8, 2011

judged

For the first time in a long time, I felt judged by my weight. It cut through me like a knife and it hurt like hell!! And I think it hurt more because it was done by someone I know.

I know that I am not as thin as I use to be, but I am the same person that I was when I only weighted 100 pounds (well I have grown up a bit, a little more wiser).

The sad thing about being judged is that you don't get the chance to explain yourself, you don't get the chance to defend yourself...you are just looked over and thrown to the side like a piece of trash.

I know I am love by God and I know He does not judge me for my weight....He loves me just the way I am. And I am ok with that...that is the man I need more in my life.

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San Diego, CA, United States